With all love in the air this month, we decided to share the story of SJCL students Jeff and Jennifer Wharton, a married couple navigating their way through law school together. Learn more about how they both decided going to law school was the right choice for them, what advice they have for dating and how they make their relationship a priority even during the stressful times.
Tell us about yourselves and the road that led you both to law school.
JEFF: I worked in sales for about 15 years or so and every few years, I’d have to change companies. When you start at a new place, it’s kind of like acting where you have to audition, prove yourself again and start at the bottom. I had a couple of setbacks and was told I wasn’t needed anymore a few times and that got old. So I took some time and took a good look at the next 20 years of my life and I didn’t want to be starting over like that in my 40s and 50s, so I figured a career in law would be a great avenue to go down.
JENNIFER: I got my bachelor’s degree in marketing and eventually found myself in San Diego where I met Jeff. I became a marketing consultant for various businesses and did that for a while. Eventually we got engaged and while I was planning the wedding, my clients started doing budget cuts because the economy wasn’t doing too great, so I was getting cut from different jobs. I was already having the itch for getting a higher education so I’d have more control with my own business and not be at the mercy of budget cuts and get the rug pulled out from under me. We talked about it and decided it’s now or never for me to go for my Juris Doctor and get it done before we start our family and building our life together.
Why did you decide to attend SJCL?
JEFF: We lived in San Diego and Jen decided to go to law school first, so I’m just following in her footsteps. She’s in her last year and I’m in my first, so we don’t have any overlapping classes or anything. We looked at the colleges around San Diego and it’s two to three times the cost to go to one of those schools. Her family is in Fresno and mine is from Modesto, so we’re from the Central Valley and it just made sense to have a strong support system around us and the money we saved was just an added benefit for us.
JENNIFER: I did some research and looked at schools in San Diego first and the tuition was two to three times more expensive than San Joaquin College of Law (SJCL). And because most of our support system was here in Fresno and SJCL’s tuition was more affordable, we decided to move back to the Central Valley.
Was it difficult or beneficial to be married while you were in law school?
JEFF: We don’t see each other as much as we’d like to but with Jennifer already going through the whole process, she has a better understanding of what I’m going through and the time commitment that it takes. And now, I have more of an appreciation of what she went through three years ago during her first year of school. We knew what to expect going in because we spoke to other attorneys that went through SJCL before us. We knew there would be a strain on the relationship, school or our jobs and one of those had to give, so we made it a priority that it wouldn’t be the relationship. Another benefit is if I have questions, she’ll know where to point me and can be really supportive because if you haven’t gone through it, it’s hard to explain what going through law school is like because it’s completely different from undergrad or even running a business.
JENNIFER: Looking back, we went through all of the most stressful things a couple can go through in a short time. Moving cities, starting a new career and going back to school to reinvent yourself are all big stress factors and we did them all in a month as a newly married couple. I had to learn a completely different way of thinking and writing during my first year and I was very concerned with the failure rates because we had both sacrificed so much to get to that point. But I made it through and relied on him to find balance and support us. I was fortunate to be able to branch out to do internships and explore the area of law because you really don’t know what law entails until you’re in it and you don’t know what doors are out there waiting to be opened until you’re experiencing it and networking with people. Jeff was definitely my rock during that time and always made me feel balanced and letting me know that I was going to get through it and he would have my back no matter what.
How do you balance a healthy school, work and home life?
JEFF: We’re a little off balance, but we make it work. We make sure to go to our climbing gym a couple of times a week, we’ll have at least one meal together and we commit at least an hour a day to each other between our classes and work. It’s a 16-week crunch of not doing anything but law school and then we get a few weeks of break and then we’re back at it again. We take a few weekend trips during the breaks to spend time together too, so balance is difficult but as an attorney you’re going to have to learn prioritization skills. We also both know what it takes to pass a class, so we understand the hours it takes to have your head down and nose in a book and we’ll make time to walk the dog together and talk about different subjects. While I’m studying, she’s hearing the first year stuff again and that’s helping her as she prepares for the bar and getting a fresh perspective on it from me. The encouragement from her is also very helpful.
JENNIFER: Every semester, our schedules change a little bit. For example, this semester we only see each other on Mondays and Tuesdays for maybe 45 minutes each day. On Mondays I go to work during the day, come home for a walk with him and then I’ll go to night class until 10 p.m. and it’s the same on Tuesday, but he goes to his night class instead. On Wednesdays, we both get home around 4:30 so we’ll have dinner together and go to our climbing gym to have some us time together. On Thursdays, I have work and we both have classes that overlap so we’ll both get home around 5:30 or 6. We call that our Friday because we typically take a break that night to order a pizza and maybe watch Netflix together. We’ll see each other on the weekends and hang out, but we’re doing outlines or reading or studying. Honestly even though we’re in the same room doing completely different things, it’s usually law school-related and I still feel connected to him doing that and it helps. So while there’s not a ton of time that we spend together, it’s definitely become more quality time when we do.
How important is it that you both communicate and have the same end goal?
JEFF: I think the goal is important and it’s what keeps me motivated. My personal career has been equivalent to attorney work as far as income goes, but knowing that one day we’ll be able to set our own schedules and really be the owners of our own calendar is what makes all these long hours of studying and hard work worth it. In reality, SJCL is a great deal compared to what undergrads cost nowadays, so it’s definitely a worthwhile investment.
JENNIFER: It’s extremely important because law school has the ability to take so much time and dedication to achieve. It also has the ability to make you tired, so you need to stay focused on the bigger picture and know where you want to go. Law school isn’t a race, it’s a marathon and if you’re running without knowing where your end goal is, you’re going to get tired. You need to have an idea of where you want to go after law school before you even start the journey and you can figure out the details along the way.
What advice do you have for students who are dating or are considering dating fellow law students?
JEFF: I’ve seen that go badly for some classmates. It might become more manageable after the first year, but when you start law school you’re learning a whole new language and it can be an added stress to date while you’re going through that.
JENNIFER: I don’t think dating fellow law school students is a good idea just because SJCL is a small school and if it doesn’t work out, you’re stuck with that person for another three years so it can get awkward. I think once you’re past your first year, you can have more balance in your life and it’s easier to date people.
How accessible is the faculty when you have questions or need extra help?
JEFF: They were very accessible. I’ve never been one to need to go see a professor for anything, but they’re definitely approachable and constantly available. There’s a good student-to-professor ratio and it doesn’t feel like a large college where you can get lost. The professors are great at figuring out what your motivations are to be there and will offer advice, services and contacts where you can get more information and learn more about the field you want to go into.
JENNIFER: They’ve been great. I enjoyed every professor I’ve had and Dean Atkinson is very personable. I’ve met with most of the teachers many times in their offices and during class and they’ve always been very friendly. It’s a small school feel and the focus is definitely on the students, which I appreciate. Everyone is very accessible and if they’re not, there’s always someone else who’s willing to help you.
What advice do you have for future students who are considering going to law school?
JEFF: If you are in a relationship during law school, it’s important that your spouse or significant other is in it from day one. Bring them with you to the Dean’s Reception and listen because they will give good advice. If they don’t understand what you’re going through, it’s going to put added stress on an already stressful situation. And always make time to not do law school, even if it’s only for a little bit. You have to take a break because you can’t keep your foot on the gas every day or you will burn out. You need to focus on the reasons you’re in law school and the why because it is stressful and it’s incredibly difficult. SJCL has a phrase they like to say and it’s “get comfortable with being uncomfortable” and that’s a great mantra. Even if you breezed through high school and college, know that law school will challenge even the best and brightest students and you have to get comfortable with that
JENNIFER: I think higher education is important and it’s a great decision. If you’re afforded the opportunity, just do it and get it done. Even though my dad and brother both went to SJCL, there’s no way to understand what law school is going to be like until you’re in it. From the outside looking in, you can’t really connect and understand how much work it really takes to get through school. It’s going to be a lot of work and you have to experience it yourself to realize how much time, dedication and effort it takes to succeed, but it’s definitely worth it in the end. It’s a great investment in you.
Want to learn more about San Joaquin College of Law, sit in on a class or set up an appointment to discuss your law school future? Contact our Admissions Counselor, Francisco "Javier" Rosas today!